What is narcissistic love bombing?

You may have heard of love bombing associated with narcissistic or abusive relationships, and wonder what does that mean? Love bombing is one of the really important signs to notice when trying to spot an unhealthy start to a relationship.

Love bombing happens at the beginning of a relationship and it’s distinctly different than normal courtship. The beginning of any relationship can feel exciting and you can think of the person often and want to spend time with that person. This is different than love bombing.

Below, I’ll list some examples of the difference between love bombing and normal courtship.

1. The types of compliments and verbal affirmations.

Love bombing: “you are the best person I’ve ever met in my life”, “you are perfect in every way.”

2. The types of displays of affections.

Love bombing: sends an extreme amount of gifts to your work such as flowers, candy, balloons, stuffed animals. Buys a really expensive gift. Invites you on a vacation away.

Normal courtship: takes you to a nice dinner, brings flowers when they pick you up, holds the door open for you.

3. Commitment and promises

Love bombing: promising you a future, discussing marriage and kids, introducing you to their family or friends right away

Normal courtship: discusses goals for the future to see if you all align

4. Past romantic partners

Love bombing: says their ex was “crazy”, says that no one comes close to comparing to you, devalues their past romantic partners and puts you on a pedestal

Normal courtship: discusses past partners with respect and honesty, takes responsibility for their part

As humans, we crave to be seen and loved. This is why I love bombing can feel really good and be hard to spot until it’s too late. A healthy start to a relationship slowly builds into something that can last. It doesn’t burn fast and bright, and then burns out. When thinking about building a house it’s important that there is a sturdy foundation in place first.

As always, be kind and gentle to yourself. Abuse is NEVER the victims fault.

If you have any more questions about the love bombing, or trauma therapy please reach out via the Metta Holistic Therapy contact page or email me directly at reneeminxtherapy@gmail.com – if you’re in crisis or an emergency please call 911.

Published by reneeminx

Somatic EMDR Holistic Female Therapist

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